M: Hi ducky. S: Good morning, my love. M: So guys M: Had a real rough night last night. Did not sleep well at all. Just had a lot of body pain and… I told Simon today that I really want to make this video because I keep telling you guys about building a ladder, and about the importance of how it’s little steps. It’s not necessarily like huge epic trips to Hawaii. And you’ve only seen me in my videos bei positive and happy. So I want to show you guys how I get through a really hard day and how I build that ladder. Just so that you guys can look at this video and go: “I know those days,” and like, “okay, I can follow some of those steps.” Or people who don’t know what you’re going through; you can show them what it’s like to build a ladder. So I’m starting my ladder to build myself out because I’m feeling so down and depressed, and my body is killing me that I just wanted to stay at home in bed all day and not leave the house, but I’m starting my first step: I’m getting out of bed, and that is a really big base ladder step. Then I’m gonna go pick out some colorful clothing, something that makes me feel happy to wear, and something that I think people looking at me on the street might smile if they see. And then we’ll see where we’re going from there. Two very important rungs on the ladders, guys. M: Thanks for getting through this with me, ducky.
S: I’m always there for you, girl. M: Alright, let’s go. S: Okay. M: Okay. M: -sniffs- My tears steamed up my glasses, and I couldn’t see where I’m going. M: I’m down!
S: You did it, girl! M: Ladder! S: I love you, mum! M: He’s the worst possible therapy dog, because he smells so bad. M: I’m sure most therapy dogs like smell good, but Spudgy just is like You’re just like moving your mouth away from him when he tries to rub his slimey face on you. M: Thanks, buddy; it does make me feel better. I love you. M: This is my pig hat, and my pig hat I use to get extra strength when I’m having a real hard time So when I’ve acknowledged that I’m having a hard day, Simon puts the pig hat on me, and it gives me more power because the pig hat is filled with the power of the pig. M: Kogi does not like the pig hat. S: Why do you have two pigs, by the way? M: They’re different. This is a pig, and this is a pig /hat/. S: Question: Why do you have three pigs? M: [in Meemer’s voice] What the-? M: Well, we were gonna film and open the fan mail. I can’t even — S: live stream. — a live stream today, but I’m feeling a bit too down. Uh, my original plan for when I wake up feeling miserable is usually lying in bed and not doing anything all day. I usually just like lie on the couch all day and watch Netflix and literally chill, because I put ice packs on my body. Get it? M: Chronic pain joke~ S: Netflix and chillll – what what? M: Netflix and chill~ M: Today, I’m gonna push myself. I have serious shoulder pain. My shoulder’s been dislocated for how long ago, ducky? S: Probably like three weeks. M: Three weeks. I can’t get it back in. I’m seeing physiotherapists; it’s not working. My elbow hurts; my knees are shooting. Everything is just in so much pain, and When you’re in pain, it mentally affects your mind as well and so it’s real easy just to stay at home, but it doesn’t make you feel better, and I think we can all agree to that. Whether you’re depressed or you have chronic pain or whatever you’re going through, staying at home does not necessarily make you feel better. It’s good sometimes, because you need to rest your body. But in this case, for my mental well-being, I’m gonna try real hard to get out of the house. To add a different rung to my ladder that helps me pull myself out of this pit. M: Hey, never underestimate the importance of music. I’ve been enjoying what Simon calls “shitty George Michael.” You don’t know anything about music! This is, ladies and gentlemen, “The Best of George Michael,” and I love George Michael, and music makes you feel really great, but you have to try to avoid the dark music. Because man, do I have a whole, entire playlist dedicated to dark music. But on this day – this is not the day. This is the day that you listen to something that makes you smile. Something that makes you want to dance. Even if you’re just like elbow dancing, ’cause you can’t support your weight. So that’s a – that’s a big rung on my ladder is listening to music to kinda get me going. M: My hair is soaking wet. Um, but I just do not have the energy to blow dry it. So what I’m gonna do is some loose braids. I’m not lifting my arms up high. I’m keeping them down as low as I possibly can, and I’m just gonna do some real loose braids. It still looks cute, right? S: You’re a cute girl — M: Looks cute~ — I like your little braids! M: So I’m gonna try to do one more on this side here. A lot of people have been asking me about what this like blue, sticky stuff they see on my knees and legs are. And it’s KT tape, which is like a athletic wrap or athletic tape. Doesn’t cure it. It doesn’t make it feel like super better, but it keeps me from damaging it /more/. Mobility aids: These are all different types of aids that are important to help you out, and I used to be really embarrassed to wear these out. This is so ugly! I asked them if they had it in black or white, and they’re like, [in accent] “No, only skin color beige!” Ugh. Anyways, so I added some Sailor Moon charms that I got from some of you nasties in the mail. But it like doesn’t even – I can’t even draw on it. It’s just so ugly. I’m trying real hard not to use a heavy bag or something that will pull my shoulder throughout the day. This I can easily just sling over here. Alright, I think we’re ready to go! M: Butterfly! M: You see him? S: It’s a little butterfly in a rosemary plant. M: He’s like omnomnomnom~ M: When I’m having my… like lowest of days, I try my absolute hardest to look at things around me and try to observe some thing that’s like interesting or cool or beautiful. Like this Morning Glory plant, like climbing up and just spilling over. And like this butterfly eating. If I just walk like constantly and I just think inside my own head that I’m just like looking inside myself and seeing all this darkness. So I try to like turn the spotlight and face it outwards, so that I can see things that are like cool or pretty or nice. So that’s one of the big, strong things I try to do. And I’m lucky today that I can walk. ‘Cause you know, ducky, when I’m having a bad like leg or knee day — S: Mhm. M: You know, me taking a taxi or I’m not leaving at all or I have my cane. But now I can like walk and like observe some things. M: Come observe with me~ M: That’s a big boy! M: A nice, salted salmon onigiri. M: Made me really happy to open it up; felt like some big, happy childhood memories. Added definitely a little rung to my ladder on this one. Really hard to eat with one hand. M: I strongly believe that it is extremely important to get out of the house, even if it’s just going for a walk or going to the library or going to a university campus or sitting in a coffee shop, observing people. Seeing life existing outside of your own mind. Just so critical to your well-being. I’m enjoying amazing coffee at Light Up Coffee, which is one of our favorite shops. A little bit of a walk from our house, but – nice to get here. -sighs- Nice to enjoy, nice to look around. -groans- Ugh, so pooped. So, just got home after my big adventure out. I’m really happy that I went out. I think that my attitude changed a lot from the morning. In the morning, I was just about to – just give up on everything. And now I feel like I’m all tuckered out from an adventure day, where I just went for a simple walk around the block, but I saw so many things and people – alive and people walking, and people in wheelchairs, and people on bikes, and… And I feel really happy that I left the house and I had a really good onigiri. But I have to know my limits, and my leg and knee and ankle started to hurt so I’m back home. I got my pig hat on, and I got my ice packs, and I’m gonna start icing my body down, and maybe just watch a… A funny TV show to make me feel happy. -sigh- So I hope you guys can see the importance of like the small things, helping you to build a ladder. Even if you don’t live in Japan and you don’t live somewhere like that you think is super cool, I think you can still get out there and start changing your perspective and start changing your mindset to see things in a different way. You know, rub your toes on the grass, or, you know, walk to the convenience store and get a lollipop or a popsicle or take the car, or call an Uber, or take your bike, you know. Get out there and change your mind. Don’t keep your spotlight shining inwards in a dark, dark place and let it consume you. Try to, try to turn that spotlight so that it shines out, and you start seeing the things that life has to offer you. And you know what? You know you’re gonna have another bad day. It might be tonight. It might be tomorrow. But at least you started to like build that ladder, to kind of get out of that pit. So I hope this helped out with you guys. Let me know in the comments section any tips that you do to help yourself build a ladder. What small things you do within your own house. What you do with your body. What you do outside the house. Umm, yeah. And I hope this video didn’t make you guys feel too down, but I think it’s important to share some of my bad days with you, too, so that you guys can get an understanding that it’s not — it is not super easy. You know, I do struggle like you guys struggle, and I.. and I try to make myself positive and happy so that you guys can also feel the positivity, so… Pig hat and Martina out.

100 thoughts on “How I Deal with Chronic Pain”

  1. Guys in the comments recommending stuff- please don't. Please trust that people with chronic illnesses are already trying their best, are already trying all their treatments. There isn't a miracle cure, there's just management. It can actually make people feel kind of guilty that they're not taking a billion supplements and breathing Himalayan air and whatever the heck the latest thing is. I'm super glad if you've found something that works for you but the only real authority on a person's condition is them and their doctor.
    Martina, thank you for this. Thank you for showing the undignified, rubbish parts of just being a human being and getting on with life. It helps so much in making others feel less alone, and a little more normal. Love you girl ❤

  2. Had a draining day today and thought of this video, glad I refound it 🙂 thanks for sharing Martina and Simon ♥️

  3. When I first watched this video (back when it was first posted) I didn’t fully resonate with it because there was no major pain in my life. But back in October I developed fibromyalgia sparked from a bad infection. This video now is such an inspiration to keep going. It has been extremely difficult for me to adjust to this slightly new way of life. I was having a particularly bad night and I came across this video again and it truly gave me just a little hope and I guess validation (I’m sure there’s a better word but I can’t think of it) that what I’m going through is completely okay. I already had depression and anxiety previous to the fibromyalgia but it just made it worse because constant pain really messes with you. I fortunately have been able to see little rays of sunshine here and there that really bring me out of what ever dark place I go in to. This video truly has encouraged to me to remember that even the little things can be big accomplishments. Thank you thank you thank you. 💛💛💛💛💛

  4. I know exactly how you feel I have complex regional pain syndrome and some days just climbing out of bed to the sofa is an accomplishment. I have started a you tube channel about my crps an heart disease feel free to check it out an share an subscribe please . Hope you have a pain free day 😁

  5. my dear dear martina it has been a while since i watched you and simon you have inspired me in a way you could never imagine i ope you could get better and i thank you so much for this video

  6. TBH I envy all of the support that you have built up around u! Trying to get assistance for my EDS from my family is like pulling teeth. They are indifferent to my suffering & I am begging on my knees for any kind of medical help! Alienation from loved ones on top of the rest of society can break nearly anybody, but seeing you makes me stick to my own guns & walk to the beat of my OWN drum, not anybody else’s, even harder! 🥁

  7. I have watched this video three times. I am wondering if you take anything for the pain? I can relate, with my Fibromyalgia and chronic pain.

  8. I do NOT cry at YouTube videos. I am sitting here just bawling. You are so strong. You are amazing. I am going through some of those days right now. I am going to find a power object, too. I have done the "dress in a way that makes you happy" (I have a flower crown), I have holo everywhere (it makes me happy. My niece knows I love yellow, but my second favorite is "rainbowy"). It is so helpful to think about these things as intentional efforts at building my latter. Thank you.

  9. I have two appointments this week one was Tues. and it made the recovery day of Wed. a really had day for me. Even though this video is from 2017 I always remember it and come back to watch it because Martina makes me laugh and smile and see the small things in the day that are good even on the worst of days. Woman where ever you are at today I hope your week is rocking 😀

  10. Martina – I cant imagine what you go through on your bad days and I think you are so inspirational. I needed to watch this today xxxxxxxxxxx

  11. Today I woke up not able to raise my left arm up, knees at their weakest theyve been in years, and my tremor is full effect but still had to go into work. At lunch, I put this on and reminded myself of the little steps to make today good and not get mad at myself. Thank you. Thanks to your sharing and community you've pulled together, even on my worst days I feel a little less alone and a little less useless.

  12. I just now found this video (April 3, 2019) and I just want to say I cried hard core. I have depression and chronic anxiety and it’s been so bad lately, but seeing this video has opened my eyes. I’m going to start reminding myself to build a ladder every day. I haven’t seen your videos since Korean class in middle school and seeing this video and remembering how happy you guys’ videos made me was amazing. I’m gonna go binge watch your vids now. #iwillbuildaladder

  13. I watch this vid everytime I have super bad day. I live with chronic pelvic pain and it sucks! Thanks for teaching me the little steps to build that ladder.

  14. I know that this is 2 years ago but you are a AMAZING fighter
    You two are one of the most happiest and mature couples I have ever seen as well

  15. I've commented on this before, but I wanted to thank you again for this courageous, inspirational video. Today was one of those days where it took me hours and hours to reach the first rung. I ultimately only managed to get myself out of bed by turning this on and climbing the ladder with you — and it's not the first time you've helped me accomplish it. Thanks again for being so open and honest about your experience. The voice you give to this fight has been heard around the world.

  16. Thank you for sharing some of what you are going through, and for the tips that help you get through the day. I just discovered your other videos and found this one. I really appreciated your honesty. Living with invisible chronic conditions is tricky. It can allow us to "pass" as not having something that affects us so deeply. It can allow us to keep it to ourselves and not always be identified with it. We can even get a mini break from it sometimes. However, it can also fool people into thinking that there's nothing wrong (the "but you look/sound fine" line can be pretty upsetting!). We all have to figure out how to manage our challenges in a way that's comfortable for us, and to find joy and quality of life despite the difficulties. Your resiliency, determination, sense of humour, and loving husband's support are all a big inspiration.

  17. Thank you for this. <3 I had shared a blog post on my Facebook page, about not having realized I had sunk into depression. I look fine on the outside, but in reality I'm dealing with intense loss and grief. My measure for what constitutes a bad day is so extreme now that I sometimes don't recognize garden-variety depression creeping up on me. I shared some small steps I was taking- opening the blinds, going outside for a very small walk, washing my hair. A friend commented that she watches your videos and suggested that I check them out for the happy/fun, and referred to your Build a Ladder idea. This is truly helpful. I'm still building little ladder steps, easing my way out from under the most recent clouds. We've lived in a travel trailer for four months now. Yesterday, I got out some beautiful notecards that I'd brought along for Spring decorations, and I put them up on the walls. This is a really helpful ladder rung. I had forgotten how much happy it gives me to see small pretty things in my home. Today, I walked just up the road and took a picture of the pretty flowers. I've been wanting to do this for a week or so, and today I did the thing, in between rain/thunder storms. I'm so glad that I did it. Now I'll have that picture to look at and smile. I write a whole blog about grief, not posting every day but when I have something to share. I balance this by trying to really focus on positive things on Instagram and Facebook. This morning I shared pictures of the pretties in our wee home on Instagram- a ladder step for me, and maybe for my friends too. Probably tomorrow, I'll share pictures of the flowers. Saving it for tomorrow, because maybe I'll need that little window of positivity then. Thank you so much for sharing this helpful, very real-world look at how you help yourself.

  18. You areand absolutely brave for putting yourself out there! We love you Martina! Keep pushing forward and building a ladder from watching your videos has even helped me with my depression and anxiety disorder as well as when im having a flashback from my PTSD and I definitely thank you for everything that you are doing and have done! Keep pushing forward and building that ladder girl!! We always got you and I know Simon will always be there for you too!

  19. Went to the doctor today after moving and having been told my whole life it's in my head. They tested my joints and said I probably have Danlos Syndrome. They were going to prescribe some anti-inflams. How did you find out that you have Danlos?

  20. This is a video I have seen before, but I was at the bottom of my ladder and needed to be reminded how to build it again, thanks…

  21. I get horrid anxiety. And if i dont check it, it would ruin not only my day but also make it hard to be the proper care taker my 2 year old needs. These tips are extremely useful. Thank you. Ive been trying to work on it and there are days where i want to sleep away the days. But i cant. I have to take it a step at a time.

  22. my hEDS is kicking my butt recently. it sucks bc. I can't even role over rn in bed bc my back and shoulders hurt so bad. my parents don't want to accept that I can't always go to school bc of my pain. they say "take meds" yet the 800 mg ibuprofen isn't helping! ugh its so difficult bc I also got my first job so that's gonna great with my pains. gotta stay strong though 🙂 keep your head held high!

  23. I come back to this video when I’m having my bad pain days and it really helps me to see that I’m not the only one going through it. Thank you Martina.

  24. That pig hat is ridicules but what ever works?! I get suicidal with pain and feel so alone, I appreciate seeing someone that has hard times, I wish u didn’t but I’m glad I got to see your video, feel better. One day I may come out with a video but I’m not in a place to put it out there yet. Thank you

  25. I wanted to say that even though this was a bad day for you, I too, have a hat I wear on bad days. It's a Moogle beanie. You're strong and I love you and your husbeast. I stumbled on your videos during a rather dark time and they've helped remind me to spread light and make sparkle but it's also ok to not be ok some days.

    Thank you for being you. 💖🌸💖🌸💖🌸💖🌸💖

  26. I never realised how much my joints popped or cracked until one day it cracked and I was in agony and could barely move and had to go to hospital. Now I’m having to go for tests and writing down how much hassle my joints give me I decided to watch your videos about your chronic pain again I don’t know what makes me pop and ache and hurt so much but I hope that when I do know I can start to build ladders like you do

  27. I know this video was hard to make, but thank you. I don’t have chronic pain, but I’ve had mental health issues that got really bad in the last couple years, and your videos and this video in particular have and continue to help me keep going. Your videos are sometimes the only things that I can still enjoy when I’m depressed or that can distract me during thought spirals.
    Again, thank you💕

  28. I know this is old but you are amazing. Your hubs is amazing. I’ve lupus, IBS, chronic kidney stones, SPS.
    Moving is the best medicine!

  29. My first step on the ladder is watching this video. Seeing Martina smile at the end of the video, seeing how much the effort helps her, gives me the opptimism to want to invest in bulding a ladder. Thank you guys for this!!

  30. I have fibromyalgia, so I also suffer from chronic pain though not to the extent that you do. I just want to thank you for sharing this video, for showing the less than perfect days and how you get through them. Not everyone understands chronic pain so the more examples there are of it out there the better understanding of it there will be among family members, friends, and even random strangers who feel they have the right to comment on your life (kind of like this but when you don't have a YouTube channel which sort of invites comments).

  31. Thank you for this video. I hole myself in the house all the time and I too will now go to get a coffee or donut or something that makes me happy….hugs to you, I will take ur ladder advice and get out more😊

  32. Have you tried Lidocaine patches I take them for my Rheumatoid Arthirits I am in severe constant pain too I feel for you hon it does take baby steps some days are better than others their is a topical cream too for pain this hurts me to the core to see you like this Martina take comfort there are others that can relate in your struggle to feel better. I was diagnosed with a meningionoma brain tumor in the posterior region of my brain close to the section where it effects breathing in 2011 my life has changed immensely since that I try to eat better and much healthier drink more water and try to get as much sleep as I can get. Sometimes I do get depressed but my cats and my bf Ben has helped me thru the last couple of years that have been really difficult for me the status on my brain tumor so fars is stable I have to go for another mri in a year or two I will be sending good vibes and prayers to the both of you and spudgy and meemers . and special prayers go out the Simon the caregiver love you both muchly Big Hugzs guys~Christina McAllister Richmond,Viginia USA 2019

  33. Sorry for the spam but have to make sure I tried everything I can: Dearest Simon and Martina. You don’t have to be in constant pain or continue to deteriorate further. Please take some time to research and look into increasing your Silica levels and oxygenation. Food-Grade Diatomaceous Earth and food-grade Hydrogen. You can find both at most health food stores and pharmacies. Rebuild those cells, cartilage, and joints. You’ll feel the difference within a couple days.

  34. I went looking for this video and I hope you can see this comment. I really needed and need this. I don't have chronic illness and don't spend my days in pain, I do have something else that's of no consequence (well, is, but not for the sake of this comment), but considering the reality of me being informed by my shrink I have a personality disorder which is the reason for a lot of misery in my life, and that I've had it in development since, or long before 15 (I'm 30 now) and neither of my parents, or (old) shrink felt it fit to inform me, it's so easy to just feel bitter, and angry, and hurt, and why me and why this, and to let myself succumb to dark and dangerous thoughts. I really, really love you two, and I'm so glad you two exist. I know my comment's more or less directed at Martina, all things considered, because I relate, at least, in some part, and I want to relate in being able to be more positive, in seeing the spotlight, the shine and dismiss the cloud of dark that reigns often over my thoughts. My own little ladder. I don't think I've even put my foot on the first rung, but perhaps that will come in time. I just really needed to write this and check out this video. I've been following you for years, quietly, sure, but I vividly remember the time you put up a vid where Martina discussed her chronic illness for the first time, and it resonated with me so hard. I hope you two are doing so, so well, supportive of each other as always, wonderful, good people who're willing to go through the pains of life and its natural obstacles together. I wish you two, truly, the best of luck. Take care of yourselves, Martina and Simon, take care. Much love, from Slovakia ♥

  35. @simon and Martina – wondering if you might be able to recommend where Martina got her sandals at the 6:42 mark in the video? I have sensitive feet and most sandals don't work well with them but the covering on these seems like it would be perfect. Any help is appreciated. As always, love and appreciate your videos eternally.

  36. Trying not to cry because it can trigger pain. I have chronic migraines and on bad days I can't walk (the feeling of the ground as I walk shoots up and reverberates back to my head). I have to take my little tiny stud earrings out because even my ears throb. I vomit. I can't look at the light. The neck pain is unbearable. I'm dizzy and can hardly walk from the vertigo. It's insane how some people think a migraine is "just a bad headache." It has literally stolen years of my life. Migraines are on a sliding scale, so some are less severe and I can get out of bed. But it's terrible to always be in pain. Even on pain free days, I still have a slight headache. It's hard to make it through days at work in the office. I can't do the things I used to. Life can be so dark for me now, literally and symbolically. All people have are recommendations, like drink more water or have you eliminated gluten. I know they mean well, but it's an actual neurological disease which causes pain. Sometimes I don't understand why we are here if we are just living life in pain? Anyone else? <3

  37. It's currently the middle of 2019, of course I've watched this video multiple times before. It's one I come back to when I'm having a hard time. But still…a minute in, I'm already teary eyed. And when I see the bestest boy, Spudgy…I'm here bawling -_- I miss you boy! <3

  38. Having a really bad day today. My chronic illnesses (tendonitis and fibromyalgia) are kicking my butt, I can barely walk around my apartment right now! But I am rewatching your videos about chronic illness and I'm building that ladder. I'm going to try to clean up my apartment a little and maybe go for a light walk when my husband gets home from work later. Thank you Simon and especially Martina for inspiring me. #BuildaLadder ❤♥💛💚💙💜

  39. Woah this Looks like a good Healthy mind set Ladder Technique thing, I have Ehlers Danlos type 3, I should try this sometime

  40. Honestly this video helped me a lot. I didnt know you had this condition and went through such hard times. All the videos I watched of you were so happy and joyful and I always asked myself, "why cant I be like that?" I get in my own head and fight with myself so that neither side wins and I stay in a slump for weeks sometimes. Now I know that I can be like you by slowly building myself out of this mental hole… I just need to shine the light on other things to let myself know that the world is still moving, life is still going and I dont have to be the only one stuck in time. Thank you so much for sharing this video! I can build my ladder by actually building things for my little nephew's. All it takes is baby steps, one inch at a time!

  41. No, your video did not make me feel bad…….my heart 💌 goes out to you! I admire you for all that I see & can sense about you!! 😘

  42. I have EDS. It’s not so bad that I dislocate things, but I have digestive problems in the form of ibs, acid reflux disease, and gastroparesis. I also get hurt easily. A fender bender 6 years ago has left me with chronic neck pain that I’ve done bouts of physical therapy for 3 times. I come back to this video when I’m laying in bed waiting for the nausea to pass, or when I’m laying down crying because my neck hurts.

  43. I had one of the hideous skin coloured slings too. I went to a fabric and craft store and got pink fabric dye and dyed it pink 😀
    Its really easy. Pop it in a bucket with the dye and let it soak for a while then rinse it until it dosnt release the dye (set with salt) and let it dry. 😛
    Chronic pain pro-tip

  44. Honey I’m wrapping my arms around you with love and healing on your rough days. Make beautiful ladders

  45. Almost every time I'm having a really bad pain/physical/mental health day I come back and watch this video to remind myself that I can build myself a ladder too. ❤ Thank you so SO much for making this video ❤❤❤

  46. I am so glad I found your channel, you are both so wonderful and are helping me so much during my own bad chronic illness days. ❤️ Thank you!

  47. Your amazing Martina. You push yourself. It takes so much out of me when I push myself everyday. I have chronic pain all day everyday.

  48. Such a strong woman. Thanks for sharing your tough day but you managed to make it fun and positive as always. 💖

  49. Gracias por mostrar tu lucha. Tengo SED y estoy pasando po mucho dolor en estos días y a veces necesito recordar que debo ser fuerte. Gracias Martina.

  50. Hi Martina and Simon. I don't have eds but social anxiety. It developed after I finished my masters and was jobless for YRS. Back then I couldnt meet friends or relatives at all, just out of panic and fear of telling them "yep same old joblessness. no development here". It was so bad that I had anxiety attacks even when doing social things I used to love (e.g. rock climbing) just cause ppl were there 'watching'. I have seeked help and have gotten much better. But still have days where my thoughts turn inward and I simply don't want to face the world. Home is my comfort bubble. But you guys are so right… I can see how forcing yourself out, even when your mind is so dark and gloomy, can make you see and appreciate the beautiful things about life. Martina, you're the strongest woman I know. Your heart and thinking can outlift all those crossfit youtubers out there!! Dunno if ya'll ever read this, but thank you so much for this video.

    Gonna go build a ladder now (and maybe find a cute fluffy hat too). 😘 ❤🤘

  51. I had to stop the video at 7:03 because I needed to tell you a few things. I wanted to wait till the end of the video so I could do one comment but I couldn't wait lol. I have a mom with Ms and fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue and I have over the last year started having low back and leg problems and and finally starting treatment and taking steps to figure out what's wrong. I have been trying to find this video over the last couple days of binge watching your videos because I have heard you talk about building a latter and when I found it I stopped everything to watch it. I never realized the little things that I do already to try and make myself feel better were thing you did too or even other people. I have had alot of bad people in my life that have told me my pain isn't real because I'm young or I'm crazy or that I'm selfish because I take self care days and I should suck it up. Ok now I'm rambling but basically seeing that morning Glory plant and how it brought you some joy made me cry really hard lol because a moon Flower is my favorite flower in nature and it's a variety of morning Glory and it just made me see how I'm doing good with what I have and it made me feel better knowing I'm building my latter without knowing I was. So thank you for spreading your joy and positivity even when you are in so much pain it makes you cry and fog up your glasses (I have been there so many times I know that feeling) . Thank you for being you and being there for all of us with your support and guidance. And thank you Simon for supporting her as much as you do . I can only dream of having a partner that supportive 🙂 🖤🖤🖤

  52. Ok now that I finished the video and got most of my sappiness out in the first comment lol . I forgot to say that I'm growing a moon flower in my room and Evey day I wake up and see it and it makes me so happy to see how much it's grown from seeds I planted not know if I could keep it alive. And looking around my room seeing this happy place I built for myself to make me happy, it made me really greatfull . Yesterday was a bad day and it was really hard to do simple things and today was Sooooo much better I got up and cleaned and re organized and finished projects and danced just because I was happy and i just wanted to say thank you again for putting this out there and being you and for making me feel like you have my back 🙂 🖤

  53. I dont know if you will ever read this, but this video just saved my life. I have been so suicidal with this chronic pain and how I cant do anything I use to do. I wanted to end it all. Thank you for posting this! You are my inspiration.

  54. Hello. this is my first time to leave a comment on your channel, but I have been enjoying your vids for some time. I don't want to talk too much about myself, but I live in Northern part of Japan in a rural area. I also lived in many years in Tokyo too. That is not the point I wanted to comment. Though I am thoroughly enjoying your videos, I have been quite concerned about your health, because I know form the fact that the modern day Japanese food is overloaded with sugar and carbohydrates, both are known to worsen inflammation in our bodies. I am not trying to endorse/recommend you with any particular treatment, but I really would like you to take a look at a low carbohydrate diet called ketogenic diet for your wellbeing. I know about Japanese food, and some other Asian foods, because I was raised by them right in the heart of Tokyo, but I was fortunate enough in that the food I was raised back many many decades ago was far different from today's, interestingly a lot less sugar and carbs in today's standard. I have nothing against reasonable intake of carbs like the traditional ones, but when you are already having some serious health issues such as Martina's, I really would like you to look into the Ketogenic diet. I am just saying this out of my love for neighbors. Nothing more. If you think my comment is uncool, just discard my comment. Thanks for reading. Wish you guys well.

  55. A friend recommended your channel to me since we're moving home to Canada (been gone 19 years) and I am watching foodie vids to destress and I happen to have EDS too. I went looking through your vids and found this after watching some foodie vids and I so instantly recognised that gait and struggle when you came out of your room that I teared up. Thanks for spreading awareness and showing the other side of things. I am an artist and people see my art and it kind of hides the every day struggle, but damn its hard some days <3 Zebra solidarity.

  56. Just discovered your channel. Your story is inspiring. How you are dealing with Eds and depression and how you live your day one little step at a time is true motivation for anyone that is going thru a rough patch in their lives. Thank you for sharing!

  57. Guess what !? I'm gonna build a ladder to get out of my sad time. When I can't walk much as other people. By just putting my feet in water. I love water. I feel in peace.

  58. Thank you so so very much for this video! You’re such an inspiration when I have chronic pain. Good luck to you and be well.

  59. I don't have a chronic illness but I live with fear all the time and I just want to let you know that this helped me too and I find all your content so uplifting. I make jewellery and for the first time in a long time I worked at my bench yesterday and I really enjoyed it. Thank youfor being you and trusting us with the good and the bad xxx

  60. I’m having one of those days today. Thank you for this. I’ve been debating leaving the house all day. After watching this I think I will. 💕

  61. Thank you for making this video and thank you for sharing all of these things. It is such an important message, and a reminder I needed right now. Thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart! 💖

  62. So sorry you are in such pain. I understand living with pain. I have Classical EDS and have had many surgeries. Our joints go out more then we do most times. It is very hard but we press on. Sending love from a fellow zebra. #ZebraStrong

  63. This helped me so much!
    Thank you for sharing your little hacks.
    I‘m having a flare up right now and this video was just soo helpful! <3

  64. Im so happy this video exists …. im having a very rough chronic pain and depression day and watching you build your ladder has gotten me to slowly start building mine for today … thank you so much for sharing this i really genuinely needed this today 💜💜💜

  65. I’m dealing with the same Lupus and fibromyalgia and a slipt disk I’m lucky to have the right treatment for my pain and insomnia I feel for you

  66. deal with chronic ulcerative colitis (inflammation in my bowel as my immune system attacks it) and chronic migraine and so often just wanted to give up my education, social life and more since I used to live in my bathroom always, dealt with it the best I could and was so happy it went away with some pills but due to high stress and failed attempt to lower my anti-depression medication it came back even worse. Had to go on sick leave but finally found something that works for me tho it means lowering my immune system (which is high from my autism) making my easier getting sick and a Lil worse than normal people get. The migraine is just there popping up randomly or due to high anxiety or stress, used to take headache medication but it stopped working tho luckily have gotten something that works. All those ends up in I can't eat dairy as breakfast, can't be stressed and often feel burnt out, so with my deep depression and social anxiety I often just get the feeling I am just one of them that gets a lot of stuff, are happy you can take your time and show how every day can be dealing with such things and just bring awareness to it. I never heard of my mom ever say she had the same chronic migraine till she had me where it went away and the bowel is at birth but first actually showed up 2 years ago, always make jokes on the number of meds I take I could eat it as cereal but it feels like a lot plus I have my migraine stuff with me at all time if it comes up.
    Wish you the best Martina and hope you'll get more good days <3

  67. I remember watching this video when it first came out and really sympathising with Martina. I don’t have EDS but I do have fibromyalgia and it sucks. Having pain flare up and just having to deal with the day. It can be so hard and honestly that’s why Martina is such an inspiration for me, cause most days I just wanna stay in bed, curled up with some Netflix.
    Having to build a ladder on a day to day basis can be hard work and mentally draining but honestly. Even though some days it doesn’t seem like it’s worth it, it always is.
    Always work to build you lil ladder. And say a big f you to pain 🙌🏻

    I can’t give my thanks enough for this video~

  68. Simon & Matrina, I love you both. Been a longtime subscriber & am truly inspired by your strength. I wish nothing but the very best. xoxoxox

  69. between this one and the deperssion video they both hit me so hard but watching the differenence was way more! im no where near as much pain as you are but i deal with chronic pain as well i messed up my back pretty bad like 8ish years ago so sleeping is a nightmare walking too much and sometimes just moving the wrong way is so much pain its hard… i think i need a support pig! lol

  70. Thank you so much. I don't even know the names of half of what's wrong with me, and I was struggling to cope today. The lack of a name makes me feel like it's not even a real problem. I've had so much experience powering through depression using techniques I've built up over more than a decade – but then I was hit with a bad pain day on an already bad depression day. I reached out through social media, which was really tough to do because I don't like to admit that sometimes it stops me in my tracks. I always want to appear an optimist. Everyone who responded did so with kindness; someone recommended this video and I am SO grateful to have been led here.
    I got down the stairs and took all my recycling out (as someone who on a good day can run a 5k this felt like a failure to me before I saw your video). I felt so down about myself and mad I haven't been doing my physio and confused because one of the new pains is unexplained. But I saw you persevering to get down your stairs and that was a pivotal point for me. It's ok to have days where that's the most you can do. This whole thing has been a welcome confirmation that I'm doing my best, these things are steps, they build up. I listened to the rain since I couldn't go a walk. I looked at my plants and a bug on my window. I found things, like you, to brighten it up.

    I never write comments but I've been so touched by your story and though I have no real idea what it must be like to go through severe chronic pain, I have learned so much from you on how to deal with mine so it doesn't exacerbate the depression spiral. Thank you <3

  71. Sending love and hugs for you Martina💕. And to those who are also going through pain. You're doing great. I'm proud of you. I'll be praying for your recovery.

  72. just found this today, while im having a really bad, sad, depressed day where life is all just to much. thank you for this and sharing this. xoxoxox

  73. I dislocated my shoulder once for 15 minutes. I cried as a grown man like a child. 😢 and your shoulder has been dislocated for weeks? 😟😟😟

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