D: Ahoi, ahoi! P: Hello, Dan and Phil games e’s [both] the google e D: eeeeee P: Dan D: Obnoxious showboating show off asses P: They are- D: They feel the need to shove yourself in everyone’s faces P: No! They’re the wayward fun person at a party. and today if you haven’t guessed, if you didn’t read the description or the title why wouldn’t you do that we’re playing google feud again D: Google fued. P: Google fued? D: I can’t spell it; I keep doing f u e d. Ironically- P: I just spat all over myself, sorry D: -googling it. D: Why is there a single biscuit on the table in front of us? P: This is the final delicious macaroon in our house. Not a macaron! It’s a macaroon, which- D: What do you mean the final one? P: We’ve- I’ve eaten the rest of them. So, we’re goi- D: Woah, woah P: What? D: That’s the last one? P: This is the last one. [Dan] There were like, fucking eight! P: I was hungry.. D: I’ve had one. P: I’m sorry! D: I’ve literally had- P: Well, if you wanna have two- D: When did I have that?! P: -win the Google Feud! D: Two days ago! P: Shh! P: That is besides the point. D: You ate- P: Shhhhh. *BETRAYAL* *macaroon flashbacks* P: We are playing for this macaroon. D: *quietly* I’m not even joking. P: And it’s not a Dan vs. Phil ’cause we’ve already got that on the board on my side. D: So, we’re just competing for- P: Playing for food. D: -for a food. Okay *gives up*. P: Uhm, I’m gonna keep- D: A food. P: A food! P: If you’ve not seen this before go watch the last one where I explain it more. D: Bants! P: Go watch that. D: Basically, people google stuff- P: Yeah! D: -they do the first half of a sentence you have to guess- P: -what’s popular. D: -what’s people is doing. P: -what’s happening in the world. P: I’m gonna be keeping notes on pen and paper- this time on a death note. So, if I drop dead during this… D: So, we’re gonna die from the things that we’re googling. Basically. P: Are you Team Shibe again? D: Uhm, no. P: What are you? D: I am Team Condiments. (same) P: Oh, and I’m using a pencil that’s actually a pen. How crazy is that? D: That was confusing the shit out of me. What the hell? P: Team Condiments. D: Team Condiments. P: Do you wanna explain that? D: Uh, I ranted about this in a video on my side channel- go subscribe to danisnotinteresting for weekly hour long livestreams. P: Are we having plugs right now? D: Oh, Phil! Do you wanna wear some merch and talk about it for two minutes? P: Yeah. D: -talking to me about product placement. P: Alright. D: I like dipping things. P: Okay. I’m gonna be The Destroyer 2. ‘Cause I mean vengeance! D: So! You mean vengeance? Does that even make sense? P: Yes! D: This is… P: Can we just play the game? D:…A disaster D: Choose a category, Phil! P: I wanna do questions! D: Boop. *reads* Is it painful to_ P: Oh! I wanna go first! D: Right. What would people google? And think about this. P: Yeah. I know. D: I think this whole game is bullshit and it’s not based on truth. But I can- I can type. You say. P: I want to type. We need to get the keyboard in the middle. D: For God’s sake! This guy is such a needy- P: Is it painful to… give birth! D: I mean- that’s the- one of the big questions of life. Go! P: Yes! D: Yeah, that’s good. P: 3000. D: But… eighth! Is that much to be proud of Phil? P: I thought it would be more than that. D: Only the eighth most popular thing. You need to think. People are like: Okay, I’m doing this. Is it painful to go to the dentist. P: Why would anyone google that? Everybody’s already been to the dentist. D: Ffff-. This game is bullshit! *rage quits* We established that in the last video. P: Yeah. D: It’s not whatever the real search results are. Whatever. P: Nice youtube hoodie by the way. D: Oh, thank y-. Very appropriate. P: Yeah. D: ‘Cause, you know, google feud. Google own youtube. Google owns my life. P: Are you just sucking up to the boss right now? D: Ergo- I need- Put me on the trending tab please. P: Look. Youtube. We love it. D: I promise I won’t swear as much in the next danisnotonfire video. Joking. P: Is it painful to die. D: WHAAAT? OOOOHHH. YOU FFffff- P: Someone’s gonna get a sweet macaroon in his mouth tonight. D: I don’t even want it. *LIIEEES* P: Ten thousand points for Team Destroyer 2. D: Is it painful to die? Well, idiots using google, that depends on how you freakin die, doesn’t it? Peacefully in your sleep, getting hit by a train: they do different things. P: You could die inhaling cotton wool. D: Exactly! P: Come on! D: Is it painful to twerk? Right. P: Write that. D: No. (do it) What would people google? (i think we just established it was “die”) P: Just think about it. Think about the common folk of the world. D: Is it painful… (maybe) …toooooo…. …pull out hairs. *spits in anger* P: Oh no. Get waxed? D: Get waxed?! P: Oooh. Drown. Get an IUD, bleed out, overdose, donate eggs. Get a crown? Have sex. Starve to death. D: I mean- most of these people- it’s like: is it painful to drown? Yeah. P: It is painful to drown. D: Is it painful to bleed out? Yeah. Is it painful to starve to death? P: Yes. D: Well, what Danny’s learned from this round is: People are a lot more stupid that I thought. Okay. Names. P: Alright. D: Can’t go wrong. Okay. Michael Buble. Bam! P: Bubles in the eight! D: Michael Bubble. P: Jackson. Obviously. D: Mmh. I mean it gets to the point where- P: Wooo! D: Shit. I- P: Wait, how many did you get? D: I thought Buble would be more relevant than Jackson these days. I guess the King is eternally relevant. Okay. P: I haven’t been keeping score but I ??? D: Michael Macintyre. (who dat?) Oooh. Oof. P: Did you spell it right though? Has he got an a or does he have the Mc? D: Oh, god knows. Why did I type that. P: Michael Jordan! D: Shit. Shit! P: Yes! D: I’m so bad. P: 8000 D: Michael… 5sos. Oh for God’s sake! P: Oh, what’s he called… Michael Clifford! D: No, no, come on. People will- P: Oooh. Why isn’t anyone googling Michael Clifford? I’ve googled Michael Clifford. D: Michael Kors. Didn’t think about that. Michael Moore. See! See, see, see. Bullshit! (get ready guys) People aren’t googling Michael Moore more than they google Michael Phelps.(lol-rant) P: No. It’s true. D: I watched the Michael Moore documentary- P: Respect the rules! Respect the rules, Dan. D: -Michael Moore in Trump land. Did anyone else? Noo. P: Obviously, they did. D: People care about Michael Phelps. He wears speedos. People time! P: Alright. How to raise… a baby. D: Your penis. (find out tonight 😉) P: What!? *rage quits as well* How is that not there? How do people even know how to raise a baby by the way? Do you just learn it from mother nature? D: Alright. What would people say? What is an object that people struggle to raise? P: *sings* You raise me uuup! D: How to raise my self-esteem. How to raise… my wages. P: Noooo. How to raise… kittens! Yes! A kitten. D: Fuck off. P: 1000. D: You said a baby and-. How to raise a puppy. P: Oh, you take- you- oohaaaah. D: Does Dan care? *high pitched* Noooooo. P: Well, I mean, the scores are looking pretty uh, Team Destroyer, I think. D: Oh no, I want get your fff- crummy macaroons. P: Chill out, Dan. D: Whoa, okay. P: Come on. D: Right, you know I’m joking- P: Yes. D: -and I know I’m joking and lots of people know I’m joking. But there are some people watching this that don’t understand that I- P: He’s joking. D: I’m not actually mad, okay? P: He’s not mad. D: I’m just having fun. It’s funny to be competitive. P: He’s having a lol-rant. D: So, I don’t care- I’m having a lol-rant? Sure. How to raise… a penis. Type it. P: I’m not typing penis. No! D: A penis, my penis, your penis… P: You have the penis! I’m gonna- Stop saying penis. I’m gonna- D: Penis, penis, penis. P: I’m gonna say a bird. D: A bird? P: Yeah… D: A bird? P: Chickens is there! So… yes! That is a very popular question. D: How to raise a boring girlfriend? What?! P: Stop being mean, significant others. D: How to raise an adult. P: Chickens was there. Penis wasn’t there! Take that! D: Blood pressure. That’s basically the same thing. P: Another thousand for Philip! D: Just saying. P: I like the questions. D: I’m terrible. P: Question! Can I be a_ D: Can I be a… P: You can be anything if you really want to be. D: That is the correct answer. P: Except for invisible. (if you try hard enough) D: Can I be a… cannibal. Damn! P: Who would be searching for-? Oh, there was loads of cannibals last time, wasn’t there? D: Exactly! P: Doctor. D: Do you think it’s career focused? P: Yes! D: Oh, screw you. Lawyer. There we go. P: Oh, you started it by cheating again. D: *does chicken dance* Uh, what did you get? 5000? D: Five. P: Can I be aaaaa… pilot! D: Can I be aaaa… celebrity. Dammit! P: No. D: Thinking about modern career choices. P: A clown on halloween. Quite topical, that, actually, isn’t it? ‘Cause clowns are scary now. D: Can I be a model? says the person googling privately to themselves at 2 am. We’ve all been there. P: Male model. D: A model at 5’4. P: Yes, you can! You can be a model at any height. D: Change the standards. Foster parent. P: Nurse. Oh, I said doctor, but not nurse. A spy. I like that. If you’re googling that you get a little point from me. *high pitched fanfare* D: This game is bullshit. P: Okay, I think we should do one more. D: Right. P: And then we’ll call it a day. D: Oh my god, I really have to get number one on all of these if I stand a chance- P: Come one, Dan! D: – of getting that delicious sweet treat. P: Is duct tape safe for_? D: Waxing. Here we go. P: Who’s gonna use that for waxing? D: Oh! Nobody apparently. P: Uuh, is it safe for- D: Kidnapping your senpai. (yes- I mean whaaaat?) P: What is anyone gonna use duct tape for that it’s not meant for? D: Lots of things. Are you kidding me? P: Walls. There we go. D: Oooh, in case it takes the paint of. Well, is it safe for paint? I’m gonna choke myself. (kinky) Completely non-kink related. I just want death. (oh okay nevermind) I’d say bondage. P: Whouy? D: I think you should type in bondage. P: Fine! D: Phil… I’m joking. P: It wasn’t even there. Babies?! D: Wha-? P: Why would you-? D: Okay, I tried to stay relaxed. I don’t like screaming that often. Is duct tape safe for babies? P: Fish? D: What the fuck are you doing with a baby and duct tape you creepy fucking weirdos?! P: I think now is the time to stop. D: Is duct tape safe for dogs? Rats? Rabbits? P: I guess maybe- D: What are you doing with rats? P: -on their collars? (couture) D: Hamsters? Cats? Skin? Why are they saying skin? If it’s not waxing then what are they doing? (some kinky shit) P: I don’t know. D: Kidnapping! (well I was wrong) P: I don’t wanna know. D: Google must know the weirdest shit about humanity. P: Yeah. D: This game is too much for me. P: It’s too much! D: It’s like looking down a dark hole of what actually is going on in the world. When you think most people are kind of normal. You know how there’s like the outside public selves? P: Yes. D: That are like- the people. But then there’s the weird shit that you think that you don’t actually- P: Your inner self. This is the inner self! D: Exactly. So, like, just the embarrassing weird stuff- P: Yup. D: – you might google at like 4 am. Incognito window. P: It’s right here. D: Google knows it. P: They know. D: Google knows. P: They save it. D: And, as I was saying, there’s nothing wrong with that ’cause Google can do no wrong. P: Yayyy, Google! (Phil what are you doing with your hand?) D: Everything’s fine. P: Anyway, more importantly: I win! D: If you see this on the trending tab it’s ’cause we sold out. P: I win, I win, I win! D: Well done, Phil. P: I don’t even need to add it up. Look at my column! D: Oh my god, that’s just so- it’s a thicc column. P: It’s so thicc. We said thicc at the same time. D: And here’s your price. No, Phil! P: What? I thought you were gonna eat it. D: I have to feed you. It’s like the Dan vs. Phil- I don’t want it. (lie) Phil is the Dan vs. Phil board. Here we go. P: What are you doing? D: I’m feeding it to you. P: Why is it so slow? (Mmm yass) P: I don’t like it! I just wanna eat it normally. *Phil hums victory music while chewing* D: You do not get to play medal ceremony! D: No, no, no, no, no. Sacrilege. Just chose another happy sound effect. Kids cheering. P: Yayy! *kids cheering* D: Well done, Phil and a big not well done to humanity for being weird af to be honest. And there we go. P: This is so good. D: That was Dan and Phil playing Google Feud. P: Oh my god. D: We thought we’d do it again as you really seemed to love it last time. If you want us to do more let us know. P: Thumb it! D: If you don’t and you’re like: Tired of this shit. People are too weird; you’re scaring me. Also let us know. P: Yeah. D: And we’ll see you next time. P: Subscribe by clicking subscribe. And also: ding the bell. I’m sorry I’m speaking with my mouth full. D: Phil, you’re so impolite. Ring that bell to get notifications. You can click on our last video over there, which might distract you from the horror of humanity P: Go have fun! D: And we’ll see you next time when Phil will have eaten another fourteen biscuits secretly. P: Oh, yeah. Bye!

100 thoughts on “IS IT PAINFUL TO DIE?! – Dan and Phil play Google Feud #2”

  1. I literally yelled bondage into my phone about the duct tale and said, Oh yeah! They can’t hear me. lol. 🤣🤣

  2. I believe it's mostly "is duct tape safe for" babies/hamsters/rats if they get a hold of some and put it in their mouths/try to eat it. Not 'can I apply duct tape to' babies/fuzzy animals.

  3. 78% of these comments are quotes

    The way you get likes is by quoting a video all the people just watched

  4. The question: 'Michael'…
    Me: Michael Mell!
    MICHAEL IN THE BATHROOM BY HIMSELFFFFFFF!
    (any BMC fans heere? (ha, get it? Jeremy Heere?) i'll leave now.)

  5. I was wearing headphones when Dan screamed at Phil's right answer(Die)… Rip my ears

  6. Phil says "why would anyone Google that, everyone's already been to the dentist" I'm 15 and never been. Phillip, how r00d.

  7. "Is ductape safe for skin" probably has to do with binding (ftm and ftnb related) and also with possible internet challenges

  8. Game: is it painful to…
    Me: die
    Phil: give birth
    Me: Die
    Dan: go to the dentist
    Me: ?!¿ DIE
    Phil: die!
    Me: T H A N K Y O U

  9. Well ofc "bleed to death" and "starve to death" are there everyone these days has at least one mental illness

  10. Dan: is it painful to bleed out
    Me: I dunno is it painful to slowly feel all of the life drain outside of your body 😊

  11. What’s this with gentiles fighting over macaroons what kinda bs is this? We all know that’s the dessert everyone dreds at Passover

  12. 6:58

    dan : ‘raise your blood pressure, it’s basically just the same thing’
    me: 😯😅😏😏

    dare i say… it hits different

  13. "Skin?? If you're not using duct tape for waxing then what are you doing? Kidnapping!!"
    Yeah so the kidnappers are nice enough to care about their victims' skin:)

  14. 'Peacefully in your sleep; getting hit by a train, they're two different things!' and other Dan and Phil quotes I've used out of context in front of my mother…

  15. In the description, it says "subscribe for fire duct tape! – Link to subscribe – (pls dont use on babies or animals)…. Bet you can't guess who wrote it.

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